January 15, 2007

The major problem i have with the marriage is my hussy attitude and making me feel as if he is doing me a favour by being married to me.I come from a monogamous home where there is peace and love and he from polymous which somehow affected him and can not understand most of his view to life.I tried to make him see things in other ways but see issues in his own way and always say his father's view to his mother is the law and as such,i should be able to act and behave like his mother who will never disaagree with his father in his lifetime no matter the discomfort.Yes,iam not perfect and i dont claim to be but with open communication and mutual respect,we can straighten out our differences.We definately come from two different background and as such,we will see issues differently but being rigid to your ways and how you want me to run my life without asking for input from me is uncalled for.

Iam a graduate myself and doing very well in my professional and can not be below his standard in anyway,afterall we met when both of us are just starting our career.I remembered those days when he will come to my house looking downcast that he hope i will forever be with him and that he hope his background will not deterred me from marrying him and i stood solidly behind him.


Anonymous said...

If of all...all these problems you are having must have started from day one. You have 4 kids withe eldest who is 14 years...I assume you have been married that long long too?! Anyways, my opinions are 1) YOU make the final decision for yourself 2) I dont know about Nigeria but I am african and educated too...Sorry I cant deal with what you are going thru....whar I am trying to say is I could have left a looooong time ago BUT dont misunderstand me girl friend each situation is different. 3)Love doesnt hate, love has no questions, love is painless,love has no why and to me you have some many tell tell sign of something not like LOVE. You also have a role to play in your marriage as you cant just blame your husband....other other your family or society you are also in that marriage because that MAN provides PERIOD and you better wake up and smell the coffee and pull your socks and FIX things up. I am not telling you to stay or leave bou stop complaining and TRY to make things better...stop saying "I wanted to go on a trip abroad with him" Try praying for that man ask God to bless your marriage, to touch that man's heart and to fix things in your marriage....Its not just your busband but you are part of the problem too.

Anonymous said...

Yes I agree with what Mr/Mrs anonymous has said. You are also part of the problem. Marriage is a 2way thing. 50-50 by both partners. even when one partner is not performing, the other partner's attitude can make him/her change. I am married (even though for not as long as you are.My advice is for you to try and impress on your husband.wish you all the best.Just change your own attitude and it will change